Parents are children’s first friends. We share their games and experiences, but it’s only natural that as they grow they start having new relationships. They meet friends at school, in the neighborhood or among the children of the family. How to help them understand who is a real friend during this emotional experience what does it mean to grow up?
work begins for 4 or 5 years, when our little ones begin to develop one of the most important social skills: learning to make real friends and keep them. Then it will be up to them to learn to recognize when a friendship is becoming a source of anguish or concern.
Teaching them from an early age the value of friendship is one of the main tasks we have as parents. Especially if we want our children’s friendships to have the potential to bring them happiness.
Help your child understand who his real friend is.
If you’re a parent, it may seem obvious that friendship should be a positive experience. But it’s not like this for all the little ones, they have to understand it. And if you don’t experience it that way, something is wrong. Children need to learn early on who a true friend is and that friendships are a source of expression of love.
How to identify a true friend?
We can’t choose our children’s friends. Especially during his period adolescence, or when friends replace all interests and become the most important thing in their lives. What we can is guide them so that they know how to build valuable relationships, in which respect and sincerity reign.
You can politely ask your child to review which of his own friendships they have the following signs, so you can determine for yourself who is a real friend and who is not so much:
A good friend…
- Celebrate your successes and support yourself through difficult times. Scream at you when you get the note you were expecting or when you score a goal. He is also by your side when something worries you and encourages you to overcome it.
- It helps you with everything you need.
- He treats you well. She is nice to you, she never makes fun of you or your opinions.
- it’s honest. He tells you the truth about what he thinks and doesn’t change his temper towards you when you least expect it.
- Stay away from conflicts and don’t make fun of people.
- he is loyal and constant. Even when they argue, you’re not worried about losing their friendship.
- They laugh and have fun together.
- He doesn’t care if you have other friends. Friendships that don’t support other people tend to be toxic.
- Respect your opinion and let it speak. Even if I don’t agree with you, value your beliefs.
- It doesn’t force you to do what you don’t want. If you don’t want to go to a party or consume alcohol or drugs, respect your decision without qualifying.
Our son can rest assured that if he has at least one friend who meets half of these characteristics, he is undoubtedly facing a meaningful friendship.
How to help your child overcome toxic friendships
Every afternoon, when she returns from school, Marina locks herself in her room. Her mother knows it’s her way of isolating herself to deal with the treatment she receives from one of her best friends who one day doesn’t leave her, and the next day she completely ignores her and separates her from the group. Marina doesn’t know how to react to a friend who loves and hates her at the same time. She is completely normal.
As in any human relationship, communication is essential. To guide your child through a toxic friendship experience, communication is the golden tool. First of all, listen to it and be a patient listener. Go through the emotional journey that makes him feel the conflict he is experiencing. Expressing his emotions is already a form of liberation.
Let him know what it’s worth
You can help your child nurture his self-esteem. One way is to pay more attention to other activities you excel at that give you access to other groups of friends. You can also encourage him to focus on making friends with other kids in the class, among whom he can find real friends.
But above all we must help our children to do it overcome the challenge they are facing when they experience a harmful friendship. Guide them so they learn and understand the relationships they establish. This will help them to have a stable position to move beyond the ailments of adolescence.
Be the true friend of others
American poet and philosopher Ralph W Emerson He wrote that “the only way to have a friend is to be one.” It is a good concept for our children to understand who a true friend is. When you treat others well, when they show the qualities of a true friend and do the right thing, good people will be drawn to them. Therefore, your way of being is very likely to attract a good friend.
Children who receive their parents’ attention and guidance to build good friendships have a better opportunity to not only identify who is a true friend, but also to establish fireproof relationships filled with fulfilling experiences.
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