A traffic jam on the highway, an argument with your partner or a flight cancellation can cause us an anger so great that it makes us want to throw things away or scream uncontrollably. Outbursts of anger or aggression are a problem that afflicts many people, especially in big cities where stress and worries are the order of the day.
In this article we give you some tips to avoid or reduce these attacks.
What is anger and why does it occur?
It is an emotion in which the heart rate accelerates rapidly, as well as blood pressure and adrenaline levels in the blood. Among the main symptoms of rabies we find, as indicated by UK National Health Service:
- sweating.
- redness.
- Tension in the muscles.
- Shortness of breath.
This aggressive urge to yell, hit, or throw things is the response of the brain when it believes it is facing danger or a threat. Anger can be caused by many reasons and, in most cases, it manifests itself when we are unable to face a situation as we would like.
When we are frustrated or feel helpless in a situation, the mind can react in different ways. Some cry, some shoot their thoughts and some get angry. Anger is automatic and in many cases it doesn’t allow us to see clearly what is going on.
There are different types of anger, we will explain them to you below.
1. Instrumental anger
Aggressive behavior and violence appear when we are unable to achieve our goals or see an obstacle that does not allow us to continue. This behavior is associated with a problem with communication skills.
2. Explosive rage
It appears when a disturbing or unfair situation is “endured” for a long time. Little daily frustrations build up And at some point they explode. For example, a person who has had a horrible day at work and gets upset about something small when he comes home.
3. Defensive anger
If an attack or difficulty is perceived, anger can “serve” as a protection. For example, not wanting to take charge of a problem or not attempting a solution in the face of adversity.
Tips on how to avoid outbursts of anger
As a first measure we must become aware of the consequences of our habits and reactions. Manage anger and rationalize emotions or irrational impulses can be of great help so that aggression and anger are not part of our life.
Some tips that may be useful in these cases are:
1. Look at the triggers for your outbursts of anger.
In what situation or time of day are you most prone to a fit of anger? Do you usually suffer from this problem with a particular person?
Outbursts of anger can hide other emotions such as fear, sadness, or anguish. Analyze why you have seizures when you are late for work, when you talk about certain topics with your partner, or when something doesn’t go the way you wanted.
2. Don’t accumulate negative feelings
One of the main causes of anger is resentment and resentment. We are like a glass filled with drops of water. Until, at a certain moment, our capacity overflows and the liquid spills over.
Something similar happens with aggression or outbursts of anger. The anger that you have built up during the day, week or month will “pop” sooner or later. To avoid this, it’s best to deal with problems as they arise.
Don’t let these negative feelings grow inside you.
3. Count to 10 (or as many as you like)
Although many times we fail to realize the exact moment our anger will explode, we have the ability to analyze the symptoms or the phases we are going through.
Take advantage of those seconds of clarity to calm down before the storm hits.
- You can count to ten, a hundred (or whatever it takes to reduce your anger), or close your eyes and focus on your breathing.
- Breathe more and more slowly and consciously. This will balance your heart rate and calm you down by putting things in perspective.
4. Exercise to mitigate your outbursts of anger
A good way to release endorphins and calm down is practicing physical activity. When the body is in motion it perspires and balances breathing and heart rate.
You can choose disciplines with a higher discharge, such as boxing or kickboxing, or opt for relaxing routines such as pilates, yoga and tai chi to reduce anger.
5. Rest
There is nothing more restful than sleeping for several hours. If you’ve had a long day at the office, the best thing to do as soon as you get home is take a bath and lie down until the next day. This way you will avoid confrontations with your family (because you will probably take your anger out on those closest to you) and your mind will relax.
Get between 6 and 8 hours of sleep every night and you can be more prepared when anger wants to dominate you.
6. Meditate, read, or dance for your tantrums
These relaxing activities are highly recommended to avoid aggression. Maybe the moment frustration takes over you, you can’t meditate, but if you practice this technique daily, you’ll have more tools on how to avoid outbursts of anger. Take advantage of your free time to read, dance, play with your children or any other task that brings you serenity.
7. Avoid irritating situations (or people).
If you know that your boss is the worst in the world on Monday mornings or that your partner is more prone to fights when they have exams, don’t approach them if they can trigger your anger. If traffic makes you angry, leave the house early or take the subway. This way you will not be in contact with those situations or people who increase the chances of suffering an outbreak.
However, if you feel like you can’t control your tantrums, We advise you to consult a psychologist or a psychiatrist to provide you with strategies that may help in your case.
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