Trust is one of the fundamental pillars in any relationship.. If this is lost, the safest destination will be conflicts and eventual breakup. Fortunately, we can regain trust and rebuild the relationship into a better version.
However, this process requires I commit and patience, because the results are not immediate. However, it’s not impossible. Let’s see below how to achieve it.
9 tips to regain trust in your relationship
Trust in the couple can be lost for many reasons. Among the most common are infidelity, lies and hiding some valuable information from the other.
In any case, one of the parties (or both) does not respect the existing agreements (tacit or otherwise), so the couple ends up becoming someone we cannot count on. However, all is not lost.
Even if we make mistakes, it is possible to regain our partner’s trust. To do this, we recommend the following.
1. Cultivate patience
The first step is to acknowledge it Your partner’s trust will not be restored overnight. It is a process that takes time and effort. And depending on the quality of the link before the deception, this will be easier or more difficult.
It is also important that they are aware that there will be ups and downs. That is to say, there will be times when they feel the relationship is progressing, but at others they feel stagnant.
The process is not linear. You need to show more commitment and a willingness to resolve conflicts assertively.
2. Demonstrate commitment with facts
It’s one thing to promise that we’ll change and make things better, it’s quite another to act on it. It is useless to make empty promises. We must be willing to take whatever action is necessary to restore confidence.
Going beyond words, turning them into actions, is the best way to take advantage of the opportunity our partner has given us. Well, let’s show you that we are committed to doing our part.
3. Be consistent
To regain the trust of our partner is also important maintain commitment over time. We have already said it in the previous paragraphs: this process has its ups and downs and takes time.
Therefore, the ideal will be show a genuine interest in repairing the damage. Not only to obtain forgiveness, but to rebuild the bond from solid foundations.
To do this, always keep the details, keep your word and commit to changing all those negative dynamics that precipitated the conflicts.
4. Work on assertive communication and empathy
It is important for both of you to give each other the time and space to assertively express your feelings and opinions. To do this, both parties must be able to active listening, understanding of the other’s position and self-expression without falling into contempt.
In the beginning it is very likely that they will face difficult conversations, where pain, anger, disappointment emerge… However, it is necessary to have this connection to propose alternatives and overcome the conflict together.
You can also strengthen the communication asking your partner if they notice any progress in the relationship. Or ask him what aspects you can improve and how.
5. Propose concrete solutions
We also recommend using communication to identify conflicts that could damage the relationship and propose realistic and specific solutions.
Because of this, recognize which situations trigger arguments or discomfort within the relationship. Then, find solutions that benefit both of you, considering each other’s desires and capabilities.
If the chosen strategy doesn’t work for them in practice, they can sit back to evaluate other alternatives. For example, if one of the triggers of the conflict is the unfair distribution of household chores, it is better for both of you to draw up a detailed schedule with tasks that each of you must complete during the week.
6. Be honest
Sincerity is another requirement for regaining the couple’s trust. We cannot repair all the damages of the past and commit to change based on lies, omissions or deceptions.
Therefore, we must be able to do this show our partner that the intentions are genuine and transparent. Without it, it is impossible to rebuild a project together.
7. Take responsibility for errors
Taking responsibility for your mistakes isn’t just about repenting and asking for forgiveness. This goes further. We must understand that we have failed.
Let’s reflect on it, accept our guilt and learn. This internal work will help us grow as people and avoid making the same mistakes in the future.
8. Avoid promises you can’t keep
When we want to regain trust, we tend to make a lot of promises loaded with good intentions. But can we really meet them? If we have been unfaithful or lied to our partner, are we ready to prove it won’t happen again?
This goes hand in hand with sincerity, but not only with our partner, but also with ourselves. Therefore, we must give ourselves the opportunity to know ourselves.
Identify what your weaknesses, strengths and needs are. From there, make more accurate promises.
9. Attend couples therapy
Couples therapy is a great alternative to restore trust in the relationship. Mistrust, in fact, is one of the main problems for which couples seek this type of help.
In this case, a specialist will offer support based on the characteristics and needs of both. Therefore, if you think the situation is getting out of hand, but you want to recover and strengthen the bond, don’t hesitate to go to a professional.
A commitment of two
To conclude, we want to emphasize that regaining trust is usually a complex process that requires a lot of perseverance, patience and love. So a commitment from both will be needed for the strategies to work.
The post How to regain trust when you get another chance first appeared in research-school.