Infidelity is a concept whose scope depends on the couple itself. Everyone is different and there is generally no negotiation early in the relationship about what is allowed. For this, sometimes there are those who fall into behaviors that can be considered unethical.
If the conditions of the couple’s contract are not clear, it is very likely that there will be problems. The truth is, cheating hurts the other party and can ruin the relationship completely.
For some, a simple phone message can mean infidelity. Others, for their part, will see it as mere nonsense and will only give it importance if there is a physical act between the couple and a third person.
Be that as it may, it’s important to talk about it between the two of you. Let’s analyze it.
types of infidelity
In the first group we find physical encounters, sexual or otherwise, such as:
- Kisses with third parties.
- Sexual intercourse with third parties without the consent of the partner.
- Hugs and caresses full of affection and containment without achieving greater sexual intimacy.
Other people may consider it infidelity to have emotional feelings for another person, without the need for a sexual encounter.
- Having feelings of love and affection for another.
- Act as a romantic partner by dedicating time and energy to the relationship.
- Keep another person in mind in your daily thoughts.
- Thinking of someone else when making love.
Currently, with the technological boom, there are many other behaviors that can be considered infidelity, such as:
- chat Virtual or telephone messages with obvious expressions of desire and affection.
- communications inside Internet which include photographs or videos to fuel sexual fantasies.
- Flirt through different media without specifying the meetings.
The same premise holds for all cases. Both need to be clear about what kind of attitudes they hurt their partner or what they consider disrespectful.
In most cases where you have not defined what is allowed or what is not accepted, other behaviors result. start the secrets, lies, version changes or concealment for fear of reactions.
Daily life becomes more complex and, sooner or later, everything comes to light, aggravating the situation.
Reactions to events that could be considered infidelity
When someone feels betrayed in their feelings, reactions can go either way.
Surely, if you take it as a hypothetical fact, the answers are not the same as when you live in your own flesh. And it is that at the time of considering oneself deceived, emotions do not give rise to reasoning.
breakup of the couple
There are people who view infidelity as an unforgivable act of betrayal. Therefore, prior to the discovery, they feel it is best to break since the trust has been broken.
It must be taken into account that a situation of this size is not only painful on an emotional level, but also greatly affects the self-esteem of the deceived person. Therefore, it is not difficult for this type of reaction to occur.
anger and rage
Others suffer from a fit of rage in which they vent through yelling and name-calling at the other. The pain and shock are so strong that they need to let it all go.no half measures.
Maybe after the explosion they relax and can sit down and talk to each other about what happened. However, the above is also likely to happen and they decide to end the relationship.
“An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth” has been the prevailing phrase for some time now. In these cases the couple decides to stay together, but who has been betrayed he is incapable of not feeling resentment.
For this reason, he may also resort to infidelity to “balance the scales”. This, in addition to being harmful to both, is not healthy for the person involved.
If it has been decided to continue with the couple, it is because, presumably, they have been forgiven. Needing to do the same harm to another, it becomes clear that the person is being deceived You’re not as good as you think.
Pain, analysis and new contract
The more rational ones can use pain as a method of learning. Analyze the situation between the two, express what each expects from the other and start over.
Generally, couples find it difficult to communicate honestly and set boundaries on what they consider appropriate behavior in the relationship.
talk to a therapist
Whatever the reaction, it’s important to talk about what happened. It’s normal for there to be hard feelings and pain, but every couple is different and what works for some may not work for others.
In the face of infidelity, it is advisable to go to couple therapy, especially if you have decided to continue together. Likewise, if the interested party feels that they do not want to continue, you have to respect his decision.
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